Thanks for Nothing

We tremble, thinking we’re about to dissolve
into nonexistence, but nonexistence
fears even more that it might be given human form
– Rumi

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Some thoughts on Equality.

— At the solemn behest of the beautiful and talented Miss Lisa Dee, I’m also posting this ‘ol gem 😉 —

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The “equal” sign can be understood as a threshold in which one side of an equation is transformed into the other.

Simultaneity. The thing represented on one side is in fact the very same thing represented on the other. Einstein represented this quite simply in his most elegant and famous equation: e=mc2. What this equation indicates is that energy is in fact the very same thing as mass traveling at celestia (the speed of light) squared.

In language, the sign “equal” can be substituted with the word “is” (i.e. 2+2 “is” 4). This equation indicates that there is no difference between “4” and “2+2″…. they are the same. 4 is simultaneously both the number 4 as well as 2 and 2, as well as 3 and 1. (Note that as the “equal” can be stated as “is” the “plus” can be stated as “and”)

Another example: pick any bit of commonly accepted truth, such as “There are seven days in a week.” 7 Days = 1 Week. 1 Week is 7 days. There is no difference between 1 Week and 7 Days. 60 seconds and 1 minute. 60 minutes and 1 hour.

Man and Woman. Equal? Let us make an equation… Man = Woman. Man is Woman. Is there no difference?

Where is this going? What is the point?

I was having a conversation with a Mr. X about equal relationships. Mr. X has always tried to maintain “equal relationships” with his romantic partners. This proved to be not simply ineffective and idealistic, but also, surprisingly, not honest.

The source of the inequality is traceable to the fact that Mr. X is an intelligent and sexually well-endowed and well-adjusted man. Mr. X’s girlfriends tend to be stupid whores. This is to be understood: Mr. X’s girlfriends tend to be stupid and Mr. X’s girlfriends tend to be whores.

Please, for the sake of scientific objectivity, let us view this as a simple fact and not impose a judgment. Mr. X’s last girlfriend, god love her, was a wonderful, beautiful, gifted, and amazingly stupid whore.

Here’s where it all went wrong. Mr.X tried to treat her as an equal, intelligent, respectable woman. Whereas, the relationship would have been much more honest and fulfilling had he simply accepted her as she was, recognized that she was a stupid whore, and treated her accordingly. She may have been momentarily shocked at being discovered and recognized for the stupid whore she was, however, if Mr. X was to, for example, grab her by the hair and say: “You are a stupid whore. I love you, you stupid whore. Now I’m going to treat you like the stupid whore you are!” things may have gone swell. She, the amazingly stupid blessed whore, could have gotten everything she wanted had only they both been willing and able to be honest. They could have gotten married and had kids and lived in the bliss of truth and unconditional love.

Mr. X really did love that stupid whore.

There is a lesson to be gleaned from this parable of love. Something to do with “is”, “and”, and the stupid whore which resides in each of us… may she be loved, honored, accepted, and dealt with accordingly.

Goodness gracious, I’m GRATEFUL!

i woke up this morning all a’glow with excitement to hit the road for a cash’d out show tonight. this is a good thing, cuz there is always a 50/50 chance, it seems, that i can view a situation either as a great opportunity or a total pain in the ass. 🙂

TODAY i’m feeling good. perhaps this is because it’s day 3 of my birthday challenge. perhaps it’s because i just had a full day by myself in my own house to hang out in my underwear and do yoga in the living room. perhaps it’s because i had a fantastically intimate and wonderful talk with my best friend miss lisa dee last night. perhaps it’s a lot of things. perhaps it’s because my heart is bursting with a love i can’t control, and don’t really want to. perhaps, perhaps.

the main awesomeness is that i am making a living (meager though it may be) making ART in one form or another and TODAY i get to crawl into the Cash’d Out van and drive to San Luis Obispo to PERFORM. and then I get to do it again tomorrow.

upon my return, i’ve got quixote rehearsals, evangenitals rehearsals, and now I have the honor and privilege of playing the upright bass in Odious Ari’s awesome ensemble! it’s a wonderful life.

my 34th year on earth is right around the corner and it feels like my blooms are blossoming. i feel good. i feel strong. my heart is getting some massive exercise in the ways of FEELING. i am that i am, and it’s awesome.

life is a gift, and i feel that in my bones. i say thank you thank you thank you and yes, yes, and always yes.

Birthday Countdown

Today I commence my “Birthday Countdown Challenge”

I, Juli Crockett, hereby declare that I will do my yoga, pilates, mediation, and bass practice EVERY DAY betwixt July 1st & August 1st, the day of my entry into the breathing world (this lifetime).

I gotta get READY for the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. For 2 – 3 gigs a DAY for 2 weeks straight! For playing upright bass (or possibly guitarron) in the orchestra of my own sweet play, The Dawn of Quixote! For being 34 years old and having the time of my friggin’ LIFE! I gotta SHAPE UP before we SHIP OUT to Scotland!!!

While I focus on that, perhaps y’all could help me raise enough money to house and feed my cast and band while we’re in Scotland? We’ve got 13 days left to hit our goal of $9999 (which would JUST pay for all of our housing and put food in our stomachs) so anything you can do — donations, or just help spread the word — is GREATLY appreciated!!!

Click here for more info: http://ping.fm/UZZTz

Much love,
Juli